Okay, who here is a dog lover? I have 3 large dogs that I adore (some days more than my kids – but don’t tell the kids that), I take them up mountains, or down to the lake to play at least twice a day, and I laugh at their passion, enthusiasm and also the fact that they love frozen goose poo! (I call them goosesicles). My dogs get attention, I take them into the office with me, feed them well, get them big yummy bones and give them HUGE love. They know I am there for them and they are loved. They also know they are separate from me and I don’t view them as extensions of myself, I can just revel in them being their own quirky personalities and not taking stuff they do (such as humping other dogs on a walk) personally. [Read more…]
I am a huge proponent of Gratitude – every night I write 10 things that I am grateful for that day. When I reflect back on what I have written, the majority of them are about other people – kids, family, situations and events that I have participated in with friends, outside things such as my home, my garden, not so much about ME.
Have you ever taken time to really, REALLY appreciate how frigging amazing you are? How valued you are? Or do you define your value based on what others think?
As humans we often base our perceptions of ourselves on what others think, your friend said you were good at baking – so you value that. Your 5th grade teacher told you you were great at Math, so you focused on Math. A choir leader told you that your voice was grating, so now you don’t sing. Your boss told you you were inept but you weren’t.
Who defines your value?
I have a fun exercise that I invite you to try daily. The School of Positive Psychology says – a habit is created in 21 days. So let’s create a habit that really supports you and allows you to relax into how amazing and wonderful you are and how bright your light shines and how your light impacts people whether you realise it or not. Watch what happens…..
So here we go, either first thing in the morning or as you are heading to bed, write down 3 things – that’s it, just 3 things that you value about YOURSELF.
Don’t be vague and ambiguous. An example being – “I’m healthy.” Cool, that is great, but does it stir an emotion in you? What does healthy feel like and look like for you? How about something a tad more specific such as:- “I am strong, flexible and healthy; my legs are toned and my arms are strong.” Does that evoke a more emotional response?
Here’s the challenge. Can you write 3 things a day for 21 days that you VALUE ABOUT YOURSELF? If you have always over committed, said yes to everything and put other people’s needs first all the time this will be a delicious challenge for YOU.
There is a caveat. There is no repeating. In other words, if you have written 3 things you can’t repeat them. You need to dig and explore and like an Archaeologist find more things that you value about YOU. Trust me; you are an untapped mine and you will be able to go for years, let alone 21 days.
If you are game and do this process watch what happens. In the past when someone complimented you did you brush it off and dismiss it with a “Yeah whatever, anyone could do this.” You go out to breakfast with a friend who pays the tab. In the past you may have had a debate about who is going to pay. As you didn’t value yourself and weren’t open to receiving.
All I can say is STOP! You as a person, a human a being on this planet and part of the mixed community are important and valued. Take a deep breath and when that compliment comes – smile and receive it. When your friend offers to buy you breakie, grin with a full tummy and say “Thank you”.
If you really, truly value yourself you are open to receiving.
So let go of any control issues, sit back in a comfy chair, grab something to write on/with and really start appreciating YOU. This isn’t selfish or narcissistic. It’s a case of you being the tenacious archaeologist and discovering how delightful, delicious you are and the gift that you are right here, right now.
BREATHE AND REVEL.
Now I know that may sound a tad odd, very much like some weird sci-fi movie, or that a succubus snuck into your bedroom whilst you were sleeping, however, neither are the case. Caroline Myss uses a fabulous analogy of looking at your daily energy in a monetary way. You have $100.00 of energy on a daily basis. So let’s examine it.
The alarm goes off, you slowly pry your eyes open and the day begins. You know for a fact you have $100 worth of energy to invest in your day, your present, your future and all those things you want to create. As you stumble to the shower you remember the negative comment your partner said the night before and you dwell on it as you soap up and wash your hair, gone is $10. You now have $90 to invest in you, your dreams your goals, your DESIRES! All those wonderful things that make your heart sing, your soul soar and make you feel grateful you are alive and living the life you have. [Read more…]
Another way I look at it is one of those deep piled, soft, richly coloured, warm, plush blankets. Each person in my life has a colour distinctive to them and they wend and wind throughout my blanket. Sometimes those threads overlap others and are dominant in an area, in other areas of the blanket they aren’t as present, and instead there is a different colour. However, it is the combination of all those relationship threads that make such a sumptuous blanket that you know at any time you can wrap yourself up in it and just revel and absorb the energy and feel totally safe, loved and appreciated. [Read more…]
Have you ever tried to honk like a goose? I have, often. Especially now in the fall as the “V’s” of Canada Geese fly overhead honking away as they vanish off into the horizon or slow down to land on the lake first thing in the morning. It’s quite amazing to watch, huge “V’s” of geese all in formation, honking away, none are colliding, you don’t see one veer off on their own tangent and they all gently settle with a delicious “splush” amongst the mist rising off the lake. [Read more…]